I want the following things for Christmas:

1. Lena Dunham’s career. Please, Lena. Just give it to me. I’ll nurture it and be a great caretaker.

2. A winter boyfriend who will love me in the spring and eventually forever!

3. A Los Angeles winter in New York.

4 . The ability to tie my shoes. Ever since I was hit by a car, I can’t do it and it has negatively affected my life and my shoe collection.

5 . Lots of $$$ because who doesn’t want that?

6. The people I like and make me happy to be all living in the same city.

7. To have seen Blue Valentine and Somewhere already.

8. The best fitting pair of jeans ever. I just want my body and jeans to get along, to be friends, to understand each other.

9. To be able to read Joan Didion’s “Goodbye To All That” for the very first time again. NERD NERD NERD.

10. And most importantly, I just…I would really love….I need…it would be really great if I had more followers on Twitter. Don’t look at me like that! Stop it!

http://twitter.com/ryanoconn